Wigtalven Damtagort is a god.

She takes the form of a slim, generous wasp.

Wigtalven Damtagort created Europe seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wigtalven Damtagort, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Wigtalven Damtagort, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Wigtalven Damtagort's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Wigtalven Damtagort's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with envy.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Pray towards the east.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never mix turnips with ash.