Vinquatlik is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, awe-inspiring butterfly.

Vinquatlik created Africa three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Vinquatlik, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Vinquatlik, it will turn you into a hamster.

Vinquatlik's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Vinquatlik's Holy Commandments

1. Never sing in the presence of elders.

2. Do not resist order.

3. Erect a large gold sculpture of Vinquatlik on top of all buildings.

4. Do not wear gray clothing.

5. Always maintain patience during fasting days.