Yattapyimnak is a god.

He takes the form of a galaxy-sized, clever wasp.

Yattapyimnak created the Sun two years ago.

If you believe in Yattapyimnak, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Yattapyimnak, he will send you a sign.

Yattapyimnak's most sacred site is Mazunte in Mexico.

Yattapyimnak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not count beyond seven during ceremonies.

2. Never discuss enzymes in public assemblies.

3. Do not resist chaos.

4. Never think about quantum gravity near dolphins while wearing black dresses and balancing six silicon spheres on your neck.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Yattapyimnak.