Cabstipduss is a god.

He takes the form of a thin, competent tapir.

Cabstipduss created life twelve years ago.

If you believe in Cabstipduss, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cabstipduss, he will turn you into a giant snail.

Cabstipduss' most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cabstipduss' Holy Commandments

1. Never record numbers.

2. Always remove boots before touching platinum.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. You must love Cabstipduss.

5. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.