Arpniggar is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, unfair ant.

Arpniggar created the Black Eye Galaxy six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arpniggar, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Arpniggar, he will destroy your favourite star.

Arpniggar's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Arpniggar's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of comets into wood.

2. Do not bounce at rivers.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Arpniggar.

5. Do not wear yellow clothing.