Hugtabzed is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, thoughtless jellyfish.

Hugtabzed created vertebrates nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hugtabzed, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hugtabzed, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Hugtabzed's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Hugtabzed's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak at dawn.

2. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Hugtabzed in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never mix tomatoes with oil.

4. Do not prepare pineapples while filled with envy.

5. Never write about stars.