Rowdibpan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, sapient guinea pig.

Rowdibpan created parasitic wasps seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Rowdibpan, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Rowdibpan, she will turn you into a plant.

Rowdibpan's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Rowdibpan's Holy Commandments

1. Goats are not to be trusted.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Rowdibpan.

5. Do not cook food in pots.