Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, competent hare.

Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip created tapeworms nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip, it will jump up and down on your head.

Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip's Holy Commandments

1. Always face the west before speaking sacred words.

2. Never discuss chromosomes in public assemblies.

3. Worship no other gods but Hongamben Jatnelltail Renpagtip.

4. Never speak the names of stars aloud.

5. Never handle zinc while unclean.