Voggupnan is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, tiresome goose.

Voggupnan created an up quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Voggupnan, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Voggupnan, she will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Voggupnan's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Voggupnan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Hide from brown grasshopers for they are unholy.

3. Always keep your back turned to the east at sunset.

4. Always share turnips with strangers, but never with mice.

5. Never talk about special relativity.