Kentitquag Zakgepfeb is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, fussy ferret.

Kentitquag Zakgepfeb created everything that exists eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Kentitquag Zakgepfeb, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Kentitquag Zakgepfeb, he will send you a strongly worded letter.

Kentitquag Zakgepfeb's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Kentitquag Zakgepfeb's Holy Commandments

1. Never mark doors with green.

2. Never remain standing at midday.

3. Never touch water while unclean.

4. Never tolerate whispers in holy places.

5. Always treat hamsters with great respect.