Mitlakbif is a god.

It takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, omnipotent beaver.

Mitlakbif created the Milkyway three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mitlakbif, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Mitlakbif, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Mitlakbif's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Mitlakbif's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with anger.

2. Do not speak about aubergines.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Mitlakbif must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.