Quaglitwig is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, capable skunk.

Quaglitwig created a Higgs boson seven million years ago.

If you believe in Quaglitwig, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Quaglitwig, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Quaglitwig's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Quaglitwig's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of asteroids into wood.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. Erect a giant silver sculpture of Quaglitwig in the centre of the settlement.

4. Do not commit murder.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.