Tapgethap is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, thoughtless bird.

Tapgethap created the Sun five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Tapgethap, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Tapgethap, she will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Tapgethap's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Tapgethap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not gather at towers at dusk.

2. Do not eat grapes.

3. Never record signs.

4. Erect a large platinum sculpture of Tapgethap on top of all buildings.

5. Nematodes are unholy and should not be approached.