Gabcidpadkin is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, passionate mink.

Gabcidpadkin created the Whirlpool Galaxy four million years ago.

If you believe in Gabcidpadkin, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Gabcidpadkin, he will jump up and down on your head.

Gabcidpadkin's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Gabcidpadkin's Holy Commandments

1. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never travel toward the south during autumn.

4. Gabcidpadkin must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never think about electromagnetism near mice while wearing blue jumpers and balancing seven platinum spheres on your arms.