Tofnillshav is a god.

She takes the form of a thin, quiet dragon.

Tofnillshav created the Sol system three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tofnillshav, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tofnillshav, she will turn you into a rock.

Tofnillshav's most sacred site is Cudillero in Spain.

Tofnillshav's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare oranges while filled with anger.

2. Never handle lead while unclean.

3. Do not study ribonucleic acid on holy days.

4. Never laugh near porpoises.

5. Always make sure there are no pigs in a building before entering it.