Zogpagpan Natligstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, prudent wyrm.

Zogpagpan Natligstaf created the Sun six million years ago.

If you believe in Zogpagpan Natligstaf, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Zogpagpan Natligstaf, she will turn you into a giant snail.

Zogpagpan Natligstaf's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Zogpagpan Natligstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Zogpagpan Natligstaf.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of aluminium.

3. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Zogpagpan Natligstaf in the centre of the settlement.

4. Never wear kilts.

5. Never approach mountains carrying ash.