Gamvenweg Padkapnab is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, almighty dog.

Gamvenweg Padkapnab created humanity eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gamvenweg Padkapnab, it will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gamvenweg Padkapnab, it will turn you into a hamster.

Gamvenweg Padkapnab's most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Gamvenweg Padkapnab's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed tomatoes to nematodes while wearing coats.

2. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Do not contemplate gravity during the night.

5. Hide if eight porpoises approach from the south.