Yokratlap Faddibgunnut is a god.

He takes the form of a four hundred metre long, staggering finch.

Yokratlap Faddibgunnut created an up quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Yokratlap Faddibgunnut, he will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Yokratlap Faddibgunnut, he will turn you into a puffin.

Yokratlap Faddibgunnut's most sacred site is Tatul in Bulgaria.

Yokratlap Faddibgunnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about optics near ducks while wearing blue scarves and balancing three silver spheres on your arms.

2. Do not speak sacred words in spring.

3. Never speak aloud of secrets.

4. Draw representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Always wear plain shorts during rituals.