Artfattit is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, irritating parrot.

Artfattit created life seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Artfattit, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Artfattit, she will turn you into a duck.

Artfattit's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.

Artfattit's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from green monkeys, for they are unholy.

2. Never jump near grasshopers.

3. Do not resist fate.

4. Always check lakes for frogs.

5. Do not count beyond seven during ceremonies.