Monflowfon is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, irritating goblin.

Monflowfon created water eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Monflowfon, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Monflowfon, it will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Monflowfon's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Monflowfon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Always cleanse your hands after touching carbon.

3. Do not resist fate.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Never paint your arms yellow.