Ranstragvog is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, clever snail.

Ranstragvog created the universe eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Ranstragvog, she will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Ranstragvog, she will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Ranstragvog's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Ranstragvog's Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never bounce in the presence of rats.

3. Do not step barefoot upon blue earth.

4. Do not eat carrots.

5. Do not name children after dolphins.