Xemnadort is a god.

She takes the form of a large, bad-tempered shark.

Xemnadort created the planet Venus four million years ago.

If you believe in Xemnadort, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Xemnadort, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Xemnadort's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Xemnadort's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Xemnadort.

2. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

3. Never mark doors with yellow.

4. Always store tomatoes above ground.

5. Do not eat peas.