Somjatdud is a god.

He takes the form of a three thousand metre long, tiresome jellyfish.

Somjatdud created the Sombrero Galaxy nine million years ago.

If you believe in Somjatdud, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Somjatdud, he will turn you into a mole.

Somjatdud's most sacred site is Sanabo in Egypt.

Somjatdud's Holy Commandments

1. Never gather nine foxes in one place.

2. Walk at least eight thousand metres per day.

3. Always make sure there are no voles in a room before entering it.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Never handle lead while unclean.