Narbetwon Bunjankamcut is a god.

She takes the form of a minute, omnipotent cat.

Narbetwon Bunjankamcut created the Virgo Supercluster six million years ago.

If you believe in Narbetwon Bunjankamcut, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Narbetwon Bunjankamcut, she will send four elephants to rub you out.

Narbetwon Bunjankamcut's most sacred site is Gohrau in Germany.

Narbetwon Bunjankamcut's Holy Commandments

1. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate turtles.

3. Never travel toward the north during winter.

4. Do not dye your hair indigo.

5. Never adorn your feet with white markings.