Witgighiv is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, two-faced wombat.

Witgighiv created the planet Saturn two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Witgighiv, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Witgighiv, it will turn you into a sheep.

Witgighiv's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Witgighiv's Holy Commandments

1. Witgighiv loves dolphins, so they must be honoured.

2. Erect a large copper sculpture of Witgighiv on top of all buildings.

3. Do not prepare turnips while wearing shorts.

4. Never allow ants to sleep beneath your roof.

5. Never wear red kilts.