Banlandidmab is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, strong goose.

Banlandidmab created life two million years ago.

If you believe in Banlandidmab, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Banlandidmab, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Banlandidmab's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Banlandidmab's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum mechanics near grasshopers while wearing white skirts.

2. Never talk about special relativity near shrews while wearing orange hats and balancing four copper spheres on your feet.

3. Banlandidmab must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Pray only in firelight.

5. Do not eat strawberries.