Femdudnad is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, omnipotent swan.

Femdudnad created a photon three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Femdudnad, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Femdudnad, she will turn you into a goat.

Femdudnad's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Femdudnad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Do not laugh in public.

3. Put Femdudnad first in all things.

4. Never sit near otters.

5. Always help sick monkeys.