Babwabyik is a god.

It takes the form of a massive, moody dog.

Babwabyik created a charm quark three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Babwabyik, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Babwabyik, it will think nothing of it.

Babwabyik's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Babwabyik's Holy Commandments

1. You must love Babwabyik.

2. Always share melons with strangers, but never with otters.

3. Never feed lots of bread to cats while wearing yellow jumpers.

4. Shun those given to greed.

5. Never gather eight monkeys in one place.