Toflargshav is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, uncaring newt.

Toflargshav created the planet Saturn twelve years ago.

If you believe in Toflargshav, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Toflargshav, he will be mildly annoyed.

Toflargshav's most sacred site is Vinezac in France.

Toflargshav's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about quantum field theory near goats while wearing violet dresses and balancing eight titanium spheres on your feet.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never record signs.