Capweehak is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, temperamental squid.

Capweehak created dark energy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Capweehak, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Capweehak, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Capweehak's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Capweehak's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching iron.

2. Do not fashion sacred items from clay.

3. Do not covet oxen.

4. Always obey Capweehak's priests.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.