Nanstipranlip is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, strong rhinoceros.

Nanstipranlip created a Higgs boson six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nanstipranlip, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Nanstipranlip, it will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Nanstipranlip's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Nanstipranlip's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into orange rooms.

2. Never write about optics.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Always count to four before sleeping.

5. Never mark doors with brown.