Begkanhim is a god.

It takes the form of a five thousand metre long, compassionate donkey.

Begkanhim created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine million years ago.

If you believe in Begkanhim, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Begkanhim, it will destroy your home planet.

Begkanhim's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Begkanhim's Holy Commandments

1. Never approach crossroads carrying wood.

2. You must pray to Begkanhim eight times a day.

3. Never discuss deoxyribonucleic acid in public assemblies.

4. Do not prepare nuts while wearing rings.

5. Never talk about frogs.