Rillmilpid is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, self-confident yak.

Rillmilpid created Europe eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Rillmilpid, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Rillmilpid, it will say rude things about you at parties.

Rillmilpid's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Rillmilpid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not trade with those who eat garlic.

2. Never talk about gravity near otters while wearing white scarves and balancing nine lead spheres on your feet.

3. Paint representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

4. Always act with patience when addressing elders.

5. Never allow doves to witness sacred rites.