Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip is a god.

It takes the form of a heavy, flying walrus.

Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip created the solar system four million years ago.

If you believe in Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip's Holy Commandments

1. Shun those given to greed.

2. Never fashion tools from wood.

3. Do not wear tin on your body.

4. Always wear plain jumpers during rituals.

5. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Candobzim Banweebag Limflamtip in the centre of the settlement.