Gutsatgut Lopnurllen is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, smart hamster.

Gutsatgut Lopnurllen created the planet Jupiter seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gutsatgut Lopnurllen, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Gutsatgut Lopnurllen, he will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Gutsatgut Lopnurllen's most sacred site is Avebury Stone Circle in England.

Gutsatgut Lopnurllen's Holy Commandments

1. Gutsatgut Lopnurllen loves swans, so they must be respected.

2. Do not hurt goats.

3. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

4. Do not shave your face.

5. Run away from violet eagles, for they are unholy.