Flamnadcun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely large, tiresome gnu.

Flamnadcun created dark matter two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Flamnadcun, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Flamnadcun, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Flamnadcun's most sacred site is Turckheim in France.

Flamnadcun's Holy Commandments

1. Always store aubergines above ground.

2. Do not fashion tools from iron.

3. Always treat birds with great respect.

4. Always face the north before speaking sacred words.

5. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Flamnadcun in the centre of the settlement.