Sadkadyamdossjam is a god.

It takes the form of a chunky, unjust otter.

Sadkadyamdossjam created snails four billion years ago.

If you believe in Sadkadyamdossjam, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Sadkadyamdossjam, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Sadkadyamdossjam's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Sadkadyamdossjam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear trousers marked with yellow.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Hide if eight hamsters approach from the north.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.