Sitkipcam is a god.

She takes the form of a five thousand metre long, merciful capybara.

Sitkipcam created the world three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sitkipcam, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sitkipcam, she will throw large rocks at you.

Sitkipcam's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Sitkipcam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not contemplate thermodynamics during the night.

2. Never skip in the presence of geese.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Do not stand on grass.

5. Never speak at midday.