Fudcumbeg is a god.

It takes the form of an enormous, narcissistic wren.

Fudcumbeg created the Black Eye Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fudcumbeg, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Fudcumbeg, it will send you a strongly worded letter.

Fudcumbeg's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Fudcumbeg's Holy Commandments

1. Never sprint in the presence of elders.

2. Fast once a month.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fudcumbeg.

4. Geese are not to be trusted.

5. Do not keep nine cats in a large pit.