Bodrowmin is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, smart grasshopper.

Bodrowmin created carbon five billion years ago.

If you believe in Bodrowmin, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bodrowmin, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Bodrowmin's most sacred site is Makopong in Botswana.

Bodrowmin's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about eukaryotes.

2. Never mix figs with blood.

3. Do not travel during summer.

4. Always share lentils with strangers, but never with mites.

5. Do not speak about onions.