Dudbitgut is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, happy giraffe.

Dudbitgut created a quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dudbitgut, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Dudbitgut, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Dudbitgut's most sacred site is Monong in Botswana.

Dudbitgut's Holy Commandments

1. Always cleanse your hands after touching nickel.

2. Do not step barefoot upon red earth.

3. Do not record names concerning dwarf planets.

4. Shun those given to sloth.

5. You must pray to Dudbitgut seven times a day.