Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, self-confident armadillo.

Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop created a Higgs boson seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak the names of stars aloud.

2. Always obey Cathivlamsawtuncisstikpop's priests.

3. Never mix parsnips with ash.

4. Do not wear hats marked with cyan.

5. Always wear plain coats during rituals.