Dogwapvon is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, clever frog.

Dogwapvon created the Virgo Supercluster nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dogwapvon, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Dogwapvon, it will turn you into an amoeba.

Dogwapvon's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Dogwapvon's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Otters are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Do not utter prayers while touching copper.

4. Never mark doors with magenta.

5. Never feed limes to tapirs while wearing coats.