Bopbimxuck is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, thoughtless crane.

Bopbimxuck created the Large Magellanic Cloud eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Bopbimxuck, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Bopbimxuck, he will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Bopbimxuck's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Bopbimxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Do not utter prayers while touching nickel.

2. Never proclaim while facing south.

3. Never wear magenta dresses.

4. Never write about cell theory.

5. Never eat bark.