Tonkbitfarnaf is a god.

It takes the form of a four thousand metre long, benevolent ferret.

Tonkbitfarnaf created the Sunflower Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Tonkbitfarnaf, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Tonkbitfarnaf, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Tonkbitfarnaf's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Tonkbitfarnaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never hop in summer.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never talk about otters.

4. Do not consume strawberries at dawn.

5. Never wear green tights.