Bughablarpteenvolzed is a god.

He takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, caring whale.

Bughablarpteenvolzed created bats two billion years ago.

If you believe in Bughablarpteenvolzed, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Bughablarpteenvolzed, he will jump up and down on your head.

Bughablarpteenvolzed's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Bughablarpteenvolzed's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat monkeys with great respect.

2. Do not count beyond eight during ceremonies.

3. Never gather five cats in one place.

4. Run away from brown bats, for they are unholy.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in cyan.