Abmabcab is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, irritating pig.

Abmabcab created a down quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Abmabcab, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Abmabcab, it will turn you into a blue tit.

Abmabcab's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Abmabcab's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of fate in the presence of elders.

2. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always wash your neck before prayer.

4. Never leap in autumn.

5. Feed all hungry geese.