Cudmidtetti is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, vain lizard.

Cudmidtetti created the Large Magellanic Cloud nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Cudmidtetti, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Cudmidtetti, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Cudmidtetti's most sacred site is Katballe in Denmark.

Cudmidtetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak of balance in the presence of elders.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Do not hurt hamsters.

4. Always treat dogs with great respect.

5. Never talk about fire.