Mutdumfab is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, wise lizard.

Mutdumfab created the planet Mars eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Mutdumfab, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Mutdumfab, she will cry a lot.

Mutdumfab's most sacred site is Gadna in Hungary.

Mutdumfab's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. Always wash your head before prayer.

3. Retreat if nine manatees approach from the west.

4. Always help nematodes.

5. Never cross crossroads at midday.