Sispinxuck is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, almighty hamster.

Sispinxuck created the Whirlpool Galaxy nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sispinxuck, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Sispinxuck, she will remove you from existence.

Sispinxuck's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Sispinxuck's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near badgers while wearing gray boots and balancing five tin spheres on your chest.

2. Always wear plain jumpers during rituals.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never wear blue kilts on sacred days.

5. Do not prepare spinach while filled with envy.